Exposing my nostalgic fantasy
The unnecessary purchase that helps me cosplay 1800s housewife. Plus an update on my new podcast!
Weekly Q&A
Q: Did you always wanna be an author or was it just a side hustle at first?
A: Both, I suppose! Writing books is at once not a job and also a totally all-consuming life calling haha. As soon as I graduated college, I made figuring out how to become a published author the focus of… well… my entire existence. At first, doing the type of writing I really wanted to do (brain-tingling, linguistic-y nonfiction) was just a side-hustle, simply because I don’t think there’s a job on earth that will pay you to do that full-time! Throughout the writing and publication of my first book Wordslut, I had a day job. Most authors I know have a day job, whether it’s teaching, or copywriting, or something totally unrelated to writing at all. Or, they come from heaps of family wealth. Personally, my livelihood is pieced together from my books, podcast, speaking gigs/workshops/writing retreats, and then one-off gigs like freelance writing assignments and social media sponsorships. I guess that wasn’t the question. Anyway, I wanted to be an author from the age of 19 or so, and I still can’t believe it actually happened.
I’m making a MAGICAL OVERTHINKERS podcast…
The plan is to launch it a month or two after the new book comes out on April 9th. This show will explore the subjects we can’t stop overthinking about, from narcissism to nostalgia to aging to cannibalism… to help those of us prone to thought-spiraling think less about the things that don’t matter and more about the things that do. What’s a subject or question you can’t stop overthinking about lately??? Taking topic suggestions in the comments below :)
(P.S. I will still be continuing Sounds Like A Cult once this show launches! I think the two pods will complement one another nicely.)
This week’s Sounds Like A Cult is one of my all-time favs.
Grab your rosary and slap on your plaid skirt (although you WILL need to recite six “Our Fathers” if it rides even one millimeter above the knee!!!) because this week’s theatrical episode is here to validate and possibly trigger all our former Catholic School #religioustrauma girlies. Recovering Catholic Aiden Arata—writer, “queen of depression Instagram,” and my former college pal—joins the pod to unpack all the pageantry and horror of this bizarre (and yet totally mainstream) marriage of religion and education. Bless the many listeners who submitted their voice memo confessions—you truly made this episode sparkle brighter than the Papal tiara. It drops tomorrow morning at 5am EST!
I officially moved to a cabin in the woods!
It’s only temporary, but I am so delighted with this choice already. Idyllwild is a rustic mountain town about two hours outside of LA. I’ve spent so many magical weekends here over the years and have always craved a longer sojourn. So, Casey and I finally decided to pack up the animals and move here for a while. Even thought I’m still working full days, being in this little A-Frame surrounded by trees and snow does something automatic to my nervous system. At the risk of sounding New Age-y, after 10 years living in LA, I’m just starting to crave more grounded energy. I might do this every year!
Also, there’s a really cute bookstore in town called Speakeasy, and when I stopped in the other day, the bookseller actually invited me to do a little wine, cheese, reading & signing event for Cultish one of these weekends. Would any SoCal residents be open to driving up for that?? We could go out to the little winery across the street afterwards! Lmk <3
A weekly roundup of books, podcasts, TV shows, tchotchkes, and anything else I’m currently “cult following.”
SHORT READ: BOTOX DESTROYED WHAT I LIKED ABOUT MY FACE
The second I get comfortable with my pseudo-feminist self-justifications about the tiny bit of Botox I shoot into my “angry 11s” (frown lines) twice a year, a writer I admire reminds me never to stop interrogating. NYT opinion writer Jessica Grose’s latest about Botox is nuanced and relatable: “I don’t want to get caught up in that endless and ultimately futile cycle of chasing a conformist beauty ideal that slips farther away with every year. That said, I can’t promise that I’ll never mess with my face again.” Yep, that.
UNNECESSARY PURCHASE: GRAYPANTS WICK RECHARGEABLE LED TABLE LAMP
Casey keeps roasting me for spending $140 on this objectively absurd table lamp, but he also keeps stealing it to play with it, so who’s really the fool! It’s an LED candlestick with four light settings (you pinch the wick to dim or brighten—it’s very fun), and as someone who’s extremely sensitive to lighting (I’d rather be in the pitch dark than under a fluorescent bulb!), I promise it sets the perfect mood for an office or bedside. I also enjoy carrying this thing around pretending to be a Tuberculosis-ridden widow living in a cottage in the 1800s. (This type of technology-supported nostalgic delusion is actually something I unpack in my new book.) Anyway, worth every penny imho!
FOOD: TRANS GIRL SCOUT COOKIES
Why not order your thin mint this year from a trans girl scout?? One of my buddies from the Trevor Project sent me this link, and I thought I’d share :)
TV: THE SEX LIVES OF COLLEGE GIRLS
This is not a new watch for me, I just can’t wait for it to return for Season 3! I’m not normally into YA-type TV or books, but this HBO show from Mindy Kaling is so hilariously written and charmingly performed, I got really into it. Pauline Chalamet’s character is my favorite. Any other fans of this show here?? Would love a recommendation for something similar to tide me over.